Tonight, I am sad. I wish to use my blog site as a means of expressing my own grief and emotions at the news of a young man, who was both a husband and father, taking his own life. There are situations in this life that makes it difficult at times for one to breathe; and this is one of those times in my life. I knew this young man when he was but a small lad growing up in our neighborhood running, jumping, riding bicycles, and playing ball just like all of the other kids on the street; including my own.
Over the years, I watched him grow into a handsome teen-ager, get his driver’s license and his first car, attend his first prom, graduate high school, and later marry and become a father of his own. I also saw him grieve over the death of his father a few years ago from losing his battle with cancer. I should know; my husband conducted the funeral service for his dad…And, my husband will now be conducting the services for this precious young man.
Suicide. The hidden, dark weapon of death that happens so quickly at times that one wonders if the angels of Heaven could have arrived on the scene fast enough to stop the piercing bullet. We ask ourselves so many questions. Especially, if we could have helped; if only we had known.
He was a young man who felt his options in this life had ended; there was no other way out. His immediate feelings of despair and distraught emotions blinded him to any Hope whatsoever. Darkened feelings and powerful forces of self-inflicting emotions and evil taking control over one’s ability to reason through a matter beyond what they are feeling and experiencing at that very moment in time….helplessness, hopelessness, lack of value, lack of love, lack of self-worth, anger and disappointment…a menance to society… Yet, they are All lies being fervently forced into the conscious of man so fast and so quickly that they pound upon the thoughts of the brain like a rushing freight train or a raging river. The adrenalin pulsating with each heart beat, no voice of reasoning within screaming to, “Stop!…Only the immediate urgency to end it all….No more…No, no more….No, No, no more….Forgetting that so many do love and care…And, in an instance…a tragic instance…it’s over…a life is forever gone from this Earth…A thousand wishes can’t bring him back…It’s Over…
The sounds of life are all gone….Nothing but still silence. The sounds of Quiet and Hush now demand and take front and center stage. The maddening voices within are all gone…the darkened forces are gone…the young man is now lying dead in his steps; no longer a living and breathing soul here on this earth. No longer can he be tormented by the fears that had so quickly alluded his mind to take his own life as the only, final way out.
For centuries theologians have debated the eternal outcome of one taking his or her own life. But, I can’t help but believe that my God shall supply all our needs in Heaven and on Earth, and when Satan so wrongfully and strongly brings a person to death’s door…that God, himself, is there on the other side; if that person has ever accepted Him as their personal Lord and Savior.
This young man had done just that. He had made God his Savior and Redeemer. So, you may ask, “Then why on Earth would he take his own life; if he believed in God?” I tell you why. For there is a power that seeks to destroy anything and everything that is good upon this Earth. A power that prowls around seeking whom he may devour. And, like a sheep who has wandered away from the fold, Satan plans his attacks at our weakest times in life when we are vulnerable to his taunting and lies. God help us all to believe more in Your Word and in Your Power to Overcome Satan and his lies in our times of weaknesses. Amen.
I hurt tonight; I deeply hurt. I want so badly to be able to go back and somehow be at the spot where he took his life and be able to stop the matter before it ever got so out of hand. I believe suicide is much like taking hold of a live-current in a power-line. Once you have touched it, the power sucks you in and even though you want to let go; you can’t. Before you can let it go; it will kill and destroy you. Satan knows this and this is why he is so clever to use this in his arsenal of attacks against mankind; saved or unsaved; believer or unbeliever. He knows the power of death when it races to take one’s life. If he can get the process started with enough force and momentum, he can speed the person’s mind into a level of not turning back, rapidly sucking in his victims like open prey.
God help us all to better understand and to stay away from this tool of darkness that walks our planet seeking whom he may devour. Protect us from its life-taking grip. Put into our hearts a new song; a song of Joy knowing that Joy Comes in the Morning; after the power of darkness is gone and no longer wants to rule and control our lives and its fate and destinies that Joy Comes in the Morning! Death is not a way out of troubles…but a dead end street to overcoming troubles on this Earth. Simply put….please don’t do it. As long as there is breath; there is hope. A new hope. A new day. A new beginning. A new way.
In all of my imaginations, I don’t know how this family will recover from their loss. I don’t even know how I or my husband will be able to minister to their grief. Yet, I know the very One; the Giver of LIfe, who can and will provide such an abundance of Grace and Mercy that they will be able to breathe again one day and one step at a time. (John 14).
My prayer tonight is that God will comfort the hearts of all those who have been touched by the loss of this young man’s untimely death. Or, the untimely death of someone you know and loved. While God knows all things and will restore all things when He returns; let us hold fast to our faith and let it not waver as we walk together, hand in hand, through the storms and trials of this life.
If there are others out there tonight who are hurting over the loss of a loved one or friend, my heart breaks for you. I pray for our God to comfort us both and assure us that there is a brighter day ahead where no death or sting of death shall ever come again.
In closing, I thank God for this young man’s life and the joys I have in remembering him smiling, laughing, and enjoying his life all the years that we lived in the same neighborhood. Things have changed now, so many have moved away, including my own family, but we all have those formative years of parenting in common…and the memoires of our children growing up together in days of splendor and innocency. Neighbors…Healthy, Happy Neighbors…It is written, “Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.” And, tonight, I feel the pain and the loss of my neighbor’s sweet son. Amen.
God Bless You and Remember God Loves You.
Lin T. Rollins, Author